The Muse: May 2021

The burnout is real.

It's not writer's block. There is so much to say, so much to express, so much to share.

It's not lack of caring. We've all cared so much, so very deeply, about us, our children, our families, friends, and colleagues, even people we don't know.

It's not lack of time. We have choices, and we all have more time than we realize.

Burnout is, simply, depletion. It's literal, physical, emotional depletion. It's defined as "a state of chronic emotional, mental, and often physical exhaustion brought on by prolonged or repeated stress."

But how? How can I be burned out when I've been able to retain my income, have a place to live, food to eat? When our pipes haven't burst from Arctic cold. When we're alive and healthy.

My family did not suffer the way others did during the pandemic. Not like our frontline workers like healthcare, delivery people, grocery store and restaurant staff... the people who've been our heroes. So if I feel burned out, I can only imagine the level of depletion experienced by those who have had it really tough.

I thought I could power through this pandemic. Take on all the extra responsibilities with school and home and work and cleaning and safety protocols. Give up the social routines, the travel, the commute I thought I hated. And for a year, I did, all that. But now, I feel its toll. As a woman, mother, human being, I feel it. I feel it not just for me but my family, my friends, colleagues, and people I've never met. The burnout is real.

It's not just COVID and its attendant quarantine though, isolating and anxiety-inducing as that has been. It's the ongoing rampant consumerism and entertainment machinery we're caught up in. It's the degradation of objective truth, respect, and integrity in our media ecosystem. It's the last 4 years of a toxic political climate. Speaking of climate, that too.

So that's why I haven't written since December.

The burnout is real. And accepting it, recognizing it, naming it, is the first step.

There's a powerful and simple word that dissolves burnout. It's "no."

When there's too much on your plate, politely push it away with a "no thank you." When the workload piles up too high, hold up your hand and say stop. When your loved ones expect more from you than you can give them, tell them why you can't right now.

"No" gives you the space and the time to breathe.

And when you say no, make sure it comes with zero guilt. It has to be a guilt-free No. Because otherwise it's not a true No. It's a I'd-love-to-but-would-really-love-not-to-right-now-so-maybe-later? wanna-be No.

Remember, too, the little secret hidden inside the term burnout. Fire reduces things to ashes. And from ashes arise new seedlings, new life, new hope. That is why you're saying No... to grow a more vibrant Yes.

        ~ Birgitte

 

Aria Luna is also feeling burned out, although not quite the same way. It's all the media interviews she's been doing (it's a fair amount). In that typical kid honesty that can cut a grown man down to size, she told me a few weeks ago she is tired of having to answer the same questions, and of talking about the same things over and over again. So we're taking a break from interviews for a bit.

From my perspective as an adult and a fellow creative, I of course see things a little differently. The creative ocean boils a deep red these days. If a journalist wants to do an interview with you, you take it. You are thrilled to talk to them, and to repeat the same things over and over again to multiple journalists... the more the better, because that means you're getting your voice out there! People are finding out about you, and your books, your art, your music.

See if you can take things from the perspective of the journalist, I suggested. "This person has never met you. This might be the first time they see your art, and they're amazed, and they want to express that. They want to make you feel good. And because your art really touches people, you will see similar reactions from many different people. This is an artist's gift to others." And she understood.

But a child should be allowed to be a child, no matter how talented, no matter how "successful" they may be at an early age. No matter what their eager parents might want for them. Children do not have the lived experiences of adults, and adults can forget what it's like to be a child.

So for now, Aria Luna is also saying her No.

I'm a little bit in awe of how much more naturally No comes to children.

                   

In spring time, blossoms take their time to open. The world is now taking time to open, too. It's still very much closed in many places, but so far, knock on wood, we're doing ok here in California and things are starting to return to life.

We have a few events coming up (see what a little No can do?)

Mama:
Chocolate Quest with Letterpress Chocolate
Private virtual event in Los Angeles

Aria Luna:
Save the Date!
Los Altos Arts & Wine Festival
September 25 & 26, 2021
10am to 5pm

This is an outdoor event and Aria Luna will have her own booth! If you're local please come say hello.